Ghana in Focus: Relationships in Ghana Part 8 == Does size matter??

 Ghana in Focus features a controversial topic that many discuss privately but rarely in public forums: addressing whether "size matters" in sexual relationships.

The conversation was sparked by a remarkable story circulating in Ghana about a woman who married a man despite knowing he had a smaller-than-average penis. After marriage, she began complaining about his size, prompting him to seek help from a local herbalist. The herbalist provided an ointment that successfully enlarged the man's penis, but this created a new problem – his wife now complained it was too big and refused intimacy altogether. 

This scenario exposes a concerning trend in modern relationships where superficial qualities override more substantial values. listeners are advised to consider what truly matters in a marriage: is it physical compatibility, or qualities like kindness, respect, thoughtfulness, and the capacity to be a good provider and parent? Many enter marriages with unrealistic expectations fuelled by stereotypes and media portrayals, particularly the harmful myth that African men naturally possess extremely large genitalia – a stereotype with troubling historical roots in slavery and the hypersexualization of Black bodies.

Scientific research indicates that the average penis size globally is approximately six inches when erect, regardless of ethnicity. This reality contradicts popular misconceptions and suggests that most men fall within a normal range that is perfectly adequate for sexual satisfaction. We emphasize that sexual compatibility involves much more than physical dimensions – technique, communication, and emotional connection play far more significant roles in sexual satisfaction than size alone.

Age-related changes in sexual function represent another important aspect of relationship dynamics that couples must navigate. For men, decreased virility and potential erectile dysfunction may occur with age, while women often experience changes in sexual desire, particularly after childbirth or during menopause. Understanding these changes allows couples to adjust their expectations and maintain healthy relationships,

The core message is that true commitment requires partners to appreciate each other holistically, recognizing that bodies change, desires fluctuate, and circumstances evolve throughout a lifetime together. The qualities that sustain marriages through these changes include mutual respect, emotional support and genuine care for one another's wellbeing.

Source:
Ghanaian man opens up about how his wife denies him sex due to s

Chapters

• 0:00 Introduction to Ghana in Focus
• 1:31 The Case of the Dissatisfied Wife
• 3:28 Challenging the "Big Dick" Myth
• 8:10 Marriage Beyond Sexual Gratification
• 13:03 Aging and Sexual Changes
• 19:34 Conclusion and Next Episode Preview

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:04

Welcome to this week's edition of Ghana in Focus with myself Kwame, ghanaian writer, broadcaster, journalist, podcaster and entrepreneur. And in this week's episode of Ghana in Focus, we are continuing or revisiting our topic about relationships in Ghana. And this week, based on what I saw recently, we're asking does size matter? All right, so that's the theme of this week's podcast Relationships in Ghana, part six. I think. Does size matter?

Speaker 1: 0:38

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Speaker 1: 1:22

Okay, so let's get into this week's podcast Relationships in Ghana, part six Does size matter Now? This is quite funny because I'm reading an article and I'll put it in the funnest to the show that a Ghanaian woman and this is why I keep saying about how funny Ghanaian women are it's a Ghanaian woman who married a man even though his dick was woman, who married a man even though his dick was small, married a man. His dick was small but still married a man. When they got married, she complained that the man's dick was too small. So what the man did this is just a short, but we'll get to it in deeper. But, like I said, I'll put the article in the front of the show and you can read it for yourself.

Speaker 1: 2:10

So when the wife told her husband that his dick was too small, the man, you know, wanted to do something about it because obviously he has to please his wife. So he, you know, met a doctor one of these herbal bliss that we have in Ghana on a chocho, and told him his problem and, uh, you know, the hair bliss gave him an ointment to use, yeah, that ointment to make his dick grow bigger. And so the man bought the oint ornament and began to use the, you know, began to use the ornament, yeah, so in about a few weeks the man's dick was big, his penis was big, and so this is where the problem is, where it began. So he went to sleep with his wife, who said that his dick was too small, but now he's big. The woman's now complaining about his dick is too big and so she's not giving him sex. And so now there's a problem with. The man now doesn't know what to do. He now wants to start using cream to get his dick back to small again or a reasonable size so that his wife will engage in sexual interest with him.

Speaker 1: 3:23

Now this brings, brings up a lot of issues. You know one of them the size matter. The size will matter because oftentimes, particularly, you know, we black men, african men, right, that the the rumor is, or the hype is why you must have a big dick. You know, yeah, black man, african man, got big dick. Yeah, you know, your dick is as big as a plantain. Yeah, that's, that's the myth. Yeah, black men, all black men, got big dick like plantain. Yeah, so you know this is craze. And so if you, as a black man, when you're with your woman, yeah, and your dick is not as big as a plantain, then you have some problems. Yeah, but my thing is that you know with you women out there, and please.

Speaker 1: 4:13

You know, I want to hear your comments, particularly you women, right, who cares for a big penis? So I mean, how big is big? Is it six inches hard? Is it eight inches hard? Is it 10 inches hard? Is it 12 inches hard? Is it 10 inches hard? Is it 12 inches hard or is it more than 12 inches? What is big? And we have to understand the women need to understand that not, you know, not every man has a big dick, it's nature, yeah. So, contrary to what this myth is about black men, that black men got a big dick right, it's not true, it's a lie. And that lie comes from slavery. But I'm not going to get into that right now.

Speaker 1: 4:55

So you know, if you're married somewhere right, just for the size of their dick, yeah, then you're not really a serious woman, because you know, size shouldn't matter. The size of someone's penis, right, someone's dick should not really matter. And I'll tell you why. For many reasons so, one of which is why, if a man's penis is too big say, it's about 12 inches when erect, right, that becomes too uncomfortable for women to have sex with. Right, because their, their thickness and the girth of the penis right will hurt the woman when the man is penetrating the vagina, vagina wars. Yeah, that will hurt the woman. So this, you know, desire this fixation that some women whether they're black, asian, white, whatever white have with the size of the penis. White, it's a madness, because ultimately, it's not how big your dick is, yeah, and we'll make it like that dick, yeah, or penis or tool, it doesn't matter how big it is, it's how you use it.

Speaker 1: 6:09

Obviously, you know, within reason, you know, if you have a two-inch dick, right, that's not going to work. Yeah. If you've got a three-inch erect dick, that's not going to work. Yeah, if you've got a three inch erect dick, that's not going to work. So, within reason. So we're talking about six inches plus yeah, because six inches is, you know, according to science, quote unquote, that's the average size dick on a man, on any man, be it black, white, asian, whatever. Yeah, that's the size of six inches. So if you are above average, then that should be fine. So if you're above 6 inches as a man, that should be fine.

Speaker 1: 6:43

So where women create for this big, big, big. You know, some men, some men use their dick like a plantain. You women out there, you're a lot of people who can't take that because that will hurt you, hurt the vagina walls, yeah. And so you know, we have to understand that it's not about the size of the tool, it's about what the man does of it and how the man is able to satisfy his woman in the bed with the size that he's been given with by the almighty. And so, you know, women have to also understand that, you know. Do you marry somebody because they've got a big dick? Yeah, is that why you enter into marriage? Because of sexual gratification? That, oh, because this man is very well endowed, he's got a big dick, so I'm gonna marry him. What about the kindness then? What about the man? Being kind, thoughtful, loving, you know, and being a good listener, being, you know, a provider, being someone who can be a good father to your children, doesn't that count?

Speaker 1: 7:48

You know this, this, this madness, particularly in particular western societies, about the size of a penis. Why it? It kind of blimes, a lot of things. And the Guyanese woman who was complaining. So why did he marry the man then? You see, this is what I'm telling you about some of our Guyanese women and some women in general.

Speaker 1: 8:10

So the man's dick was small, why did he marry him in the first place. Why so? You knew that the man had a small dick, but because he may have been rich, I don't know, he may have been something that appealed to you, you married him. So, as they say in the wedding vows, for richer, for poorer, for better, for worse, blah, blah, blah. So if you married your husband who had a small dick, then so be it, because you married that person. Yeah, it wasn't a force to marry him, you decided to marry him. So the fact that he's got a small dick should not mean then you complain about this and that, because that tells me that you married for the wrong reason.

Speaker 1: 8:53

A and that B. You're not really considering about marriage. All you want is sexual gratification, and sexual gratification is no basis for a loving, long-lasting, wholesome, fruitful marriage no way. And so you know these are some of the nuances that women take on board that, if they're not careful, can destroy relationships. So the very example now that I've given you about the Ghanaian man whose wife complained that his dick was small, went to see a herbalist to get a bigger dick via ointment. Now he's got a bigger dick, right. The wife doesn't want to have sex with him because it's too big. So now you're putting pressure on the man and now the man doesn't know what to do. Over then stop using the ointment and hopefully thinking that his penis will shrink enough so that the wife will have sex with him.

Speaker 1: 9:50

And, like I said, what is it about you women going to marriage? Of what agenda? Yeah, do you go into marriage? Because, from what I'm seeing in ghana, in no possible content and also in the western hemisphere, women do not necessarily know what they want. They think they know what they want, but you know, in reality they don't know what they want. Because if this is an example of why you married a man or why some women are marrying men, then that does not bode well for long, wholesome, meaningful, loving relationships. And so, yeah, sex is important in the context of marriage, believe it. If you're a Christian right, and you know, you believe in the Bible, you know sex is not. You know sex is not. How can I put this? Sex is not a commodity. Yeah, sex is basically about reproducing, having having children, and that's what sex is about in marriage.

Speaker 1: 10:59

So when some women come and, you know, berate their men who've got a small penis, small dick, it makes you wonder what is their, what is their real agenda within this marriage? Yeah, and I blame that guy near women because that guy near women, you knew your husband had a small dick, right, but you still married him. So that tells me that there was something other than the size of his dick that made you marry that man in the first place. Yeah, so this is why we're talking about this issue about you know relationships and the size matter, because a lot of women, unfortunately, because of stereotypes, and because about you know relationships and the size matter because a lot of women, unfortunately, because of stereotypes and because of you know a lot of these fake films that they're watching.

Speaker 1: 11:46

You know, and you know this mythical societal norms they're falling for this quite norms. They are falling for this quite trash that man should have a big dick like a plantain. A that's impossible. B that's unrealistic. And c you know it's unnatural for a man to have a penis the size of a plantain. Yeah, but more importantly, you do not marry a man for the size of his penis. You marry a man because he loves you, he respects you, he treats like a woman, a queen, he's kind to you, he's a father figure, yeah, and it's somebody that you believe in your conscience Can be a good provider for yourself and for any children that you get after the marriage. That is what Should compel a woman to marry a man.

Speaker 1: 12:54

Not the size of his tool, because ultimately, right as a man ages, two things happen and this is just part of natural aging process. The same with women that I'll come to in a minute. So with men the older the man gets, the less virile his penis becomes. So when you're in your 20s and 30s, your dick, your penis right, is upright and virile from 40 onwards. It's just a natural course of life, nature. That potency that was in your dick as a man when you're in your 20s and 30s, when you come from 100s, right, that begins to dissipate. Yeah, or the power of the penis is not as powerful in your 40s or 50s as it is in your 20s and 30s. And this is where you can take the natural. You know I'm not talking about Vibra, because Vibra is very dangerous. Yeah, because that can give heart attack. But I'm saying that there's a lot of natural remedies out there that you can take when you're in your 40s and that will make your your two virile as if you were in your 20s and 30s.

Speaker 1: 14:08

Secondly, you know again, as men get older, some men not saying old, but some men lose you say old, but some men lose, you know, the appetite for sex. So their sex drive becomes low because they've got low testosterone. Yeah, because testosterone is the compound that gives men that virility to want to have sexual relations with women. Now, if that man is lacking testosterone, right, his tool is not going to work as it is. Yeah, and also, particularly in the Western Hemisphere, because of the environment and also the diet, right, many men after 40 get what we call erectile dysfunction, yeah, whereby the A not able to get an erection or full erection, and or b they can't sustain the erection for a period of time that will enable them to penetrate a woman deeply, yeah, to allow the woman to come and probably to allow him to also come as well. So that's just a natural course of nature, natural course of life. So women should be aware that these are things that men suffer from when they get older, same with women.

Speaker 1: 15:25

So, men, you know, you have to understand that when women reach a certain age, she don't want sex anymore. You know, particularly, you've married her and she's had a couple of children. A lot of women, after they've had children, don't want sex. Yeah, because they've fulfilled their, their role as women by having children. Yeah, so sex in women, in particular women over 40 right, is something that, unless you've got a high sex drive, is something that a lot of women do not crave for. Also, the organs yeah, when a woman particularly had her children, right, that desire you know those, you know that kind of desire for sexual, sexual activity isn't really there as it was in their teens, 20s and 30s, because those, you could say, are the peak years for a woman to produce herself. Don't get me wrong. A woman can have children in their 40s, 50s and 60s. Yeah, that is still commonplace, particularly in Africa, not so common in the Western world, right, but in Africa women are having children in their 40s, 50s and 60s, but that but that is rare. Yeah, because, like I said, the peak for women right is between 18 and probably to about 40. That's the peak time when black women, african women, have their children. And so, after the age you see that a lot of women, right, lose that desire for sexual intercourse or for sexual relations, and so men need to understand that as well.

Speaker 1: 17:00

But going back to. You know this thing about the size the size the size, like I said, the size of a man's penis, right, does not matter. It's about how the man uses it right that is able to satisfy and fulfill a woman's sexual needs. Yeah, because the bigger your penis is right, in actual fact, the more damage you're going to do to a woman's vagina. Yeah, because women will find it very uncomfortable when a man has a larger penis, ie 10 inches plus, and penetrates a woman's vagina, because that can cause a lot of pain and discomfort within the woman. So it's not the size the bigger penis is, it's that. It's actually, yeah, how you use it. Yeah, and women must understand that you know, and some of them do, but size is not the be-all and end-all, and so you know.

Speaker 1: 17:59

We must come to a realignment, a proper understanding of what marriage is about. Yeah, and ask yourself, as a woman you know, because obviously you know, this thing has come out because that's a woman criticizing the size of husband, of those with penis as a woman, you must ask yourself why am I getting married? Yeah, what is my agenda or what is my reason or what is my rationale of marrying this man? Is it because I truly love him? Is it because I want to bond with him and have a family? Is it because I want to bond with him and have a family? Is it because I want to bond with him and build something that we can share together and our children? Do you want to grow with that man? Do you want to marry that man because he's a kind man, that is considerate, that is gentle, that is loving? You see, these are all qualities that women have to really consider before they even think of marrying a man, because if you marry a man, as this Ghanaian woman did, right for money probably and then you know she had other you know agenda ie sex and then realise that the man hasn't got a big penis, then you're going to get frustrated within the marriage and then obviously, that marriage could break down or have you.

Speaker 1: 19:24

And so for me, the moral of this podcast is right think before you get married. Think about what you really want from a marriage. Think about why you are entering into marriage in the first place, because marriage is a commitment. It's a life long commitment, and you don't marry somebody just because you've got a big dick. That's ridiculous, and so the moral of the story is essentially it's size does not matter. It's essentially how you use it that matter and, more importantly, it's other things outside the size of a man's penis. It is essentially how you use it that matters and, more importantly, it's other things outside the size of a man's penis that should count when a woman is choosing a life partner to be with.

Speaker 1: 20:07

And so, like I said, I will leave this article quite a strange article in the fullness to the show, and in next week's Garnet and Fergus Relationships We'll be talking about Should you, as a man, pay On your first date? So should you pay for a woman On your first date? Yep, so from myself, kwame, and from all the crew here On Garnet and Fergus Is, thank you very much for listening and we'll see you next week For some more Ghana in Focus.